It is an ongoing joke that, in the event of unexpected downpour, my hair is unthreatened because it looks basically the same in all elements.

I have extremely curly hair that ventures on Raggedy Ann territory, especially now that I've chopped it short. On a good day, it is as carefree and buoyant as my personality. On a bad day, people assume (sometimes correctly but sometimes not!) that I'm going through some personal issues.

I have never straightened it. I did not own a blow dryer until I was 27. All this, I believe, makes me an expert on curly coiffure. Below, the products, processes and tools I would take with me to the apocalypse.