I've realized over the last few weeks that my mission for 2015 and for this blog -- to live my life with more intent and less impulse -- has sort of fallen by the wayside. In its place has been a mad scramble to get keep it (barely) together in between social obligations, whether they be significant family gatherings or spontaneous happy hours.
I haven't been grocery shopping in more than two weeks, didn't go to the gym once in that span, and have even been neglecting this blog. One of its requirements, which I'd planned on and hoped for, was that I write every. damn. day. Instead, I've been dragging posts around the editorial calendar and dragging my feet.
SIT DOWN.
I'm beginning to wonder if I'm using my social life the way the author of The Art of Procrastination writes that he occasionally uses to-do lists at home to avoid deadlines at work. (If you even suspect you are a master procrastinator, I insist you read this book on the psychology. It won't even make you loathe yourself.)
Maybe I'm "For sure! Definitely in"-ing my way into avoiding real responsibilities by over-committing to social obligations that aren't really obligatory at all.
The "real responsibilities" I'm neglecting most aren't your run-of-the mill to-dos. My bills are paid, sure, but I haven't been taking care of my body or eating stuff that I made myself. I haven't made enough time to read, unplug, absorb, or even just be alone and content in it.
My sleep is suffering and my voice is beginning to sound like a more shrill, less sexy Carrie Fisher. It's got the same rasp, but it smacks more of sleep deprivation than sex-line-operator. Something's gotta give.
So, I think I'm going to try an experiment over the month of June and commit to only two "events" a week. We'll define an event as anything that requires you to leave the house with a bra on. A trip out of town will count as one event, but so will "swinging by" a happy hour. (FAMOUS LAST WORDS.) My hope is that leaving time for some self-care will actually lead to the sort of productivity that merits happy hour. I'll check back in with you guys at the end of the month to let you know how I did. Either I'll be happier and healthier, or I'll be bra-burning the candle at both ends.
